240. Talking to Kids and Teens with Big Feelings with Adele LaFrance (EFFT Part 1 of 2)

In moments when emotions run high in the family, sometimes we have no idea what to say or do. We want to support our loved ones and help them deal with problems, but sometimes it feels like our knee-jerk responses just make the situation worse! Turns out, there are practical and effective skills parents and caregivers can learn to respond to kids and teenagers (and family members of all ages!) when big feelings arise.

Emotion Focused Family Therapy (EFFT), a bonding- and attachment-focused therapy, aims to facilitate communication among family members. This approach targets power differentials, skills deficits, and aversive past experiences within the family, and works to instead foster feelings of trust, respect, and validation. Dr. Adele Lafrance, creator of EFFT and author of the APA-published EFFT manual, has dedicated her career to supporting the mental health of parents, caregivers, kids, and teens.

In the first episode of a two-part EFFT series, Debbie and Adele discuss what EFFT is, and why and how EFFT skills might be helpful for your family. Together, they work through several practical strategies you can begin using right now. Listen in to this empowering episode today! 

Listen and Learn:

  • Debbie and Yael’s professional experiences using Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT)
  • Adele’s expert breakdown of EFFT – what it is, when you need it, and how it helps
  • How EFT has evolved to be so comprehensive
  • Practical advice for caregivers who find themselves feeling intimidated or powerless
  • What “super feelers” are and the mechanisms facilitating emotional dysregulation
  • Evidence-based strategies for overcoming feelings of guilt, blame, and shame as a caregiver
  • Expert-approved methods of responding to your kids when they ask intense, confusing, or challenging questions
  • How to “build bridges” with your kid and facilitate meaningful conversations and connections
  • Adele’s practical approach to providing practical support for caregivers through her book and through emotion coaching 
  • Debbie and Adele practice skills and strategies from Adele’s book


About Adele LaFrance

Adele LaFrance, Ph.D. is a clinical psychologist, author, research scientist, and developer of emotion-focused treatment modalities, including Emotion-Focused Family Therapy. She has published extensively in the field of psychotherapy, emotion and health, including a clinical manual on EFFT  published by the American Psychological Association and a popular parenting book titled: What to Say to Kids When Nothing Seems to Work.  Dr. Lafrance is also leader in the research and practice of psychedelic medicine with a focus on ketamine, MDMA, psilocybin and ayahuasca. She is a frequent contributor in the media relating to emotion, health and the science of psychedelics.

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Episode 240