201. Fierce Compassion with Kristin Neff

by Diana HillJune 9, 2021

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Kristin Neff is a pioneer in the field of self-compassion research, teaching us that compassion involves kindness, mindfulness and common humanity. In her new book, Fierce Self-Compassion, Kristin explores the balance between tender self-compassion and action oriented self-compassion.

“Sometimes compassion means standing up, saying, ‘no, you are treating me unfairly’ and setting boundaries.”
Kristin Neff

In this episode of Psychologists Off the Clock, Diana and Kristin discuss the duality of self-compassion, women and anger, and the inner power needed to stand up and protect what you care about. Listen in and harness your kindness, claim your power, and thrive today!

Listen and Learn:

A breakdown for beginners – Diana defines “Yin”, “Yang”, “Kali”, and “Durga” and discuss their metaphors for self-compassion
Kristin Neff’s expert description of the yin and yang of self-compassion
The role the feminist movement has played in racism and oppression and what this has to do with fierce self-compassion
Nuances of feminine energy and how those nuances are embodied in different goddesses
How to access and embrace your feminine energy (read: how to balance your yin and yang and why it’s important to do so!)
Kristin’s personal experience finding wholeness and developing self-compassion amidst divorce, single parenthood, and tumultuous work experiences
When and why emotions traditionally dissociated from femininity (e.g., anger) are useful
The functionality of fierce self-compassion and practical advice for embracing it in your own life
Kristin and her friend, Angela Duckworth’s (check out our episode with her where we discuss Grit) thoughts on the bind women find themselves in when it comes to likeability and competence
Kristin’s expert, research-based definition of self-compassion
Why self-compassion is so difficult to achieve
How Kristin’s personal experiences have informed her perspective on women, relationships, compassion, and wholeness
Practical advice on how to use your values to inform your balancing behavior
What it means to be a compassionate mess and why it should be your goal

Resources:

Kristin’s book, Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive
Learn more about goddesses who embrace feminine energy: Kali, Durga, Sekhmet, and Diana
The Origins and Nature of Compassion Focused Therapy by Paul Gilbert
Diana and Debbie’s book, ACT Daily Journal
Diana will be hosting a workshop on Compassion and ACT: Acceptance, Allowing, & Making Space where you will learn to use journaling, meditation & embodied yoga practice to explore Acceptance through compassion

About Kristin Neff:

Kristin Neff is currently an Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. She is a pioneer in the field of self-compassion research, conducting the first empirical studies on self-compassion almost twenty years ago. In addition to writing numerous academic articles and book chapters on the topic, she is author of the book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself. In conjunction with her colleague Dr. Chris Germer, she has developed an empirically supported training program called Mindful Self-Compassion, which is taught by thousands of teachers worldwide. They co-authored the Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook and Teaching the Mindful Self-Compassion Program: A Guide for Professionals. Her newest work focuses on how to balance self-acceptance with the courage to make needed change. In June 2021, she will publish Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive.

For more information on Kristin Neff please visit her website, self-compassion.org.